Chronicles of DLY: Tying The Knot

A very good day to my people! A few months ago, a student councillor demonstrated how to fold birds for charity. Today i decides to teach you all about a new activity that also involves charity through saving the Kingdom a lot of money. It's called tying the knot. As you all should know, we are currently short of binding combs and might have to resort to tying our scores together with strings. So, here is a few simple steps to succesfully tying a knot.

Firstly, pick a good person to tie the knot with. Like for myself, I have picked a extreme cutie in the form of a Michellin Tyre. Having a cutie around makes tying the knot much much more enjoyable.

Secondly, take the G-string from your partner's instrument and pull for as long as possible. It would be most preferable if the G-string falls out so that you have the full length to tie the knot.

Thirdly, wrap the 2 scorers tightly together. It is of utmost importance that as much friction comes between the 2 bodies as possible. This would ensure a tighter relationship between each other and thus more passion in the music that is being played.

That is all for today's post. I sure hope it is helpful to your understanding in succesfully tying your knots. May you all have a blissful future ahead!

Chronicles of DLY: My First Post

Hi, this is your Dear Little Yant speaking. It has been a long time since I appear around this place. Fans of mine might have also nosetised that I have closed down my other blogs cos people keep miss-intepreting my language due to their lack of profesiancy in England. As such, I closed down my other blogs cause other people and things were taking up my time and some even tarnishing my reputation. But, I decided i needed to come and burst bubbles of rumour among other things.

In order to create a new image for myself and better portrayal of my extraodinary actions, I shall take on personalities of various famous characters to illustrate my day. For today's post, I shall be describing my daily life in the form of the Agent of the Queen to the Great Kingdom no. 006.5, Commander James Bong.

My adventures lately has included shooting people with bullets of vulgarity. The bad guys that I catch are usually out to tarnish my good name by suggesting that I do things that go against my personal traditional Chinese upbringing. They tend to distort the truth and give me random names in order to personify me as some scandalous character doing scandalous things. Besides my main mission to either silence such people or silence myself in front of them, I also have other side missions such as saving the numerous girls that are somehow always ficticiously linked into my personal life and ficticiously said to have done all kinds of things with me. I save them by taking the fiction out of that experience which always helps to relieve them of some pressure. Of course, such a daunting task does have its limitations and most of the time it is the presence of the "Queen". However, luckily for me, her presence is usually not in my presence and thus it does not exactly make a difference. To further relieve my personal depression, I tend to make morale boosting statements like, "She can go eat her s**t!". I also watch large amounts of football matches on channel 5 while she blasts me over the phone.

So that is the rundown of my daily life. I hope the personlification has helped you in the understanding of my life. Till next time, bye bye.

The Fine Punishment

Horh! Since the time we got our double horhness, my Brats have become complacent again. They have been trying to live up to the horniness by attemping to porn. So I have come up with this sneaky scheme to make sure they appear for rehearsals and be brainwashed by dear Pooh-bear.

Before the Horhner day, I used to make the Brats fill up a form and ask me for my autograph. Actually, it was very very nice being chased around the school like a superstar. However, now that my ego has been stroked so much that even my large surface area has been totally covered, I shall implement a new policy, to ensure that nobody will have a crutch mentality. Everybody should learn how to walk on their own and walk to rehearsals on time.

The new scheme will be called "Everyone Rellinquish Paper System To Yield from Late Entrances" or ERP STYLE for short. Basically, at the time rehearsal starts, all the doors will be closed and anybody who comes in late will have to pay a piece of A4 paper per minute. These A4 paper will be contributed back to the Kingdom throught the printing of scores for the Brats. I remember somebody once said, "I tax more not because I need the money, I can easily give the money back to charity. It is the principle in which i should get paid." Similarly, the Great Yant does not need simple A4 paper, the Deans Office has unlimited supply. It is the principle that if you are late, you pay!

To accommodate the low-income Brats, I shall not fix the quality of the A4 paper required. After all, the rather low quality paper is actually more valuable since it can double up as my toilet paper.